An Angel's Silence
by ra1n
Summary: We all know that Max and Fang are destined for one another, but what about Iggy? What is this doing to him inside?
1. Chapter 1

Fang and I were arguing. What else was new? The same old stuff. I'm bossy, he's a jerk, I'm acting all weird, but he's the one that never talks, my stupid Voice, his stupid blog. We started to elevate the volume a bit.

"I'm sick of your shit, Fang. You make me just… want to kick your ass sometimes."

"Bring it on, Max. Sure it would make you feel big enough?"

"Why do you have to be such a dick?"

"Why do you have to be such a _control freak_, Max? You always have to run everything. You're practically President Max of the Flock Nation." He was staring at me, cold, his words raining on me. _"Why can't you just be… normal?"_

WHAT?! I mean, really. What the hell can you expect from someone who had spent the first 10 years of their young life in a fucking dog cage?! Could someone really expect that I would have a normal time adjusting to my feelings about the world, about myself, about the flock, about anything that I valued or held dear to my heart?

_I was not normal_. I was a freak, an experiment, a _hybrid_. That word, that awful idea that ruined my life and the lives of my flock (Fang included), our families, and God knows how many other kids. These scientists, these awful excuses for human beings (I know, I know. I should talk, right?) ruined any chance of a normal life that we could have hoped for. We had wings, for one. All kinds of other abilities aside, _I was not normal_.

And he knew this. He knew this because the same thing that had happened to him.

So why would Fang have said that?

After all that we had been through, Fang had asked me a question that should have stultified me. Although I should have smacked the shit out of him immediately, I was actually _confused_. Did he mean normal as in my "normal" self, the don't-take-no-shit-from-anyone, never-admit-that-I'm-scared, always-ready-to-make-a-smart-ass-remark Max, or did he mean normal as in every other 14 year-old on this clueless planet?

I walked over to him, still dumbfounded, tears welling up in my eyes, and slapped him. Hard. His head whipped quickly in the direction that I slapped him, but stopped before it looked like he had been jarred too hard. He had caught quick control of himself. He didn't move his head back to face me. Lightning fast, he clapped his hands onto my chest, grabbing the hoodie I was wearing, silently whirled me around, and slammed me into the wall, cracking the sheetrock behind me.

"What more could I have done for you, Fang?" I asked him, tears spilling over onto my face. I pursed my lips hard, trying to keep my face stiff. Something flashed in Fang's eyes. Some of his intensity appeared to have lessened, and he opened his mouth, as if to say something, but remained silent, maintaining his grip on my shirt. "I love you. I love all of you. You know that I would die for you without having to think about it. I'm only the way I am because I want to protect y--"

I was cut off. Fang had brought his head down, and crashed his lips into mine. It was like being hit by a car. He instantly pacified me, sucking the negativity and anger that I felt toward him out of me. There was nothing that I wanted more than to spend eternity with him, standing right there with his hands on my sweatshirt, clenched, as if he were about to throw me across the room. I reached my hands up, gently, and set them on top of his, making his hands relax, allowing them to leave the front of my shirt and travel down to my waist, where they made their what seemed to be ergonomically designed hold around me. My residual tears smeared his cheeks, though, I was not crying anymore. Fang broke the kiss.

"I'm sorry. I mean, I, uh…" He trailed off.

"It's fine." I said, smiling warmly. "Why don't we continue this a bit later?" I suggested, just as Gazzy and Iggy walked into the living room, no doubt with mischief fresh in their minds.

"Fang?" Gazzy asked, noticing his close proximity to me. "What's… up?"

"Nothing, Gazz. We were just… having a conversation," Fang replied. Iggy scoffed, brushing his hair out of his face.

"What?" Fang asked Iggy.

"Just because I'm blind doesn't mean that I'm an idiot. Gazzy, out." The Gasman left, unquestioning, but looking a bit suspicious. "You two have been throwing around all different kinds of vibes lately, and I know exactly what those vibes mean."

"Iggy, I— " He cut me off.

"Max, it's alright. I don't mind. I just … I just wish that it wasn't so… obvious." He smirked, but not in the interest of humor. He had the look of someone who was being very honest, and was just realizing the facts themselves. He turned and walked out. I wasn't sure how I should feel.

"Fang, I think I need to talk to Iggy."


	2. Chapter 2

So. Even though I had just been fighting with Fang over something that I couldn't even remember, he managed _yet again_ to pacify me with one of his breathtaking kisses. Ugh, he knew just how to piss me off. He also managed to break the wall as he made a point. Nudge and Ella will know pretty much instantly, and then Mom will know as a result of that. Great.

And then I go and say something like, "Why don't we continue this a bit later?" All seductive and… stupid. Like he hadn't just put my ass through the wall. Damn, I was so inept at this romantic, touchy-feely relationship stuff.

On top of that, Iggy had walked in with Gaz right in the middle of us… talking, and managed to spoil the moment. Iggy, while he had been, for the most part, silent about this whole Max/Fang situation, let me know through what he said (or didn't say, for that matter) how he felt about us. I thought about it, and I let Fang know that I should talk to him. If Fang ever gave me a "duh" look in his life, this was most certainly it.

I couldn't even remember what it was that we were fighting about. I'd bet money (not that I had any, of course) that it wasn't the least bit important.

And then Angel walks in. Oh jeez.

"What happened, Max?!" She practically screamed at me, tears welling up in her eyes. I didn't know how to react. Her entrance was so dramatic, I wasn't sure if she was joking or not. Then again, she was six.

"What's wrong, Angel? What… what happened?" I asked, frantically, hearing her start to sniffle. If I could have called this situation cute, I would have, as Angel was the _epitome_ of cute. Even when she cried, she was _adorable_. I just wanted to squeeze her until our bodies blobbed together… like drops of water. Or something. Maybe it was just my maternal instinct. After all, I cared for Angel like a daughter.

"I heard everything. And both of you… I heard your thoughts… they go back and forth, 'I hate him, I love him', it scared me. Fang scared me. And then I felt him hurt you. He was so angry, and you were… you were…" she trailed off, her words devolving into a sequence of sobs. I rushed over and held her. She cried for a minute, but then took a deep breath. It looked like the storm was subsiding, at least for now. "And Max," she continued through reflexive, rapid inhales. "Iggy… Iggy hurts. He's in pain." Angel's eyes started to well up again. "He's hiding something from me… I don't know how, but he's hiding some feelings…"

"Shhhh," I whispered softly, holding her head against my chest. "We're going to work everything out. Fang and I had a fight… but we're going to settle it. Angel, I love you, I love all of you. Don't ever forget that, hon." She sniffled again, and looked up at me. "And don't worry about Iggy. I'm going to talk to him, too." Thinking of Iggy replayed in my head what Angel had just told me. I guessed to myself just _what it could be_ that he was hiding from me. As if I didn't know. I then remembered that Angel could read minds. And she was probably reading mine right then. Her eyes were so intense, looking back into mine. It was impossible to even gain an idea of what she may have been thinking.

"Promise?" she asked me hopefully. I had the suspicion that she was sneaking around in my head, looking for any inclination that would lead her to believe that I wasn't being sincere.

"Yes, Angel," I said, vehemently. I made sure that her eyes contacted mine. "I'm going to make everything all right." Angel tried to crack a smile. It didn't fully work until I half-smiled back at her, still bewildered by this entire situation. Her face then blossomed into that one-of-a-kind Angel grin that I loved to see more than anything. "Go get Iggy for me, baby," I told her. She gave one final sniffle, and nodded. Her loose curls bounced a little as she purposefully walked from the living room. I sat on the ottoman in front of the armchair, half formulating what I was going to say to Iggy, half wondering how hurt he _really_ was.

I was still flustered about this whole afternoon. Fang. Our fight. The kiss. Iggy. What he told me. Angel. Her meltdown. What she said about us. How it must have hurt her. How our vibes impacted her. How confused she must have been. And then Iggy. Again. What she said about him. How he must be feeling. How Angel must be feeling _about_ him. It was all turning into one big clusterf—I mean… cluster-bomb.


	3. Chapter 3

Iggy walked into the room, looking like he had a lot on his mind. Scratch that. He _had_ a lot on his mind. Although the superficial session that I had with him a few moments earlier sorta tipped me off as to what was going on, Angel's revelation had sealed it for me. I wasn't in the mood for any bullshit, and I knew how Iggy, a lot of the times, liked to avoid the issue at hand. I wasn't going to hear any of it. Fang made me angry enough, and then… he melted me like butter. And then Angel freaked me out. And now, I just wanted to solve this. I didn't like anyone keeping anything from me to begin with, and since I had the sneaking suspicion that this was going to be one of those sticky emotional situations, I was even more on-edge that I would be.

"What is it, Max?" He asked, not agitated, but aloof.

"I wanted to talk to you about what happened. About… what _is happening_. I mean… between me and Fang. I had a fight with him before, and then I just talked to Angel, and—" Iggy scoffed, loudly enough to where I was aware that he had something to say. I was a little taken aback, to be honest. I stopped speaking.

"So now, after this has been going on for _months_, now you want to know how I feel? Now you wanna talk? Only after I give you the tiniest dime-drop of a hint, you wanna blow the case wide open? You know, for our leader, you're not as bright as someone would expect. I don't wanna be mean, but… well, no. I really don't care if this comes off as mean to you, but you and Fang _deserve_ one another. I have never met two people _faker_ than you. It disgusts me." He said this calmly, allowing the words to sink into my brain. I was baffled. I was confused and angry. Why would he say this to me? "And you're probably wondering, 'what the hell is wrong with him? Why is he saying this?' Well I'll tell you, Max," he said as he sat down on the couch. "You and Fang are so wrapped up in each other, in yourselves, that you don't even see what's happening to the Flock, to your _family_. We're sitting here, watching you two toy with your emotions, and all the while, as you two fight, and have your little 'we're-not-speaking' episodes, you're _hurting the kids_. Look at Gazzy. He comes in, wanting to spend time with _you_, Max, and what happens? I have to tell him to 'get out'. He knows that you and Fang keep going from brother and sister to archenemies to lovers, and it's making him wonder if you still love him or not. Now, someone who's not an 8 year old can probably see that you know _how_ to separate your feelings for Fang from those that you have toward the Flock, but this kid is being hurt by Fang's… not talking to anyone, and your idiotic mood swings. It's not working—"

"Iggy, just shut up!" I screamed at him. I wasn't going to take this bullshit anymore. "Don't even _try_ to tell me that all of this is only for the kids, or that this is 'ripping us apart'. Don't you think that I see what's happening with them? Don't you think I _know_ what's going on?!" I was livid.

"Obviously not, if you still don't see my point," he said. I continued, seething.

"And where do you get off talking about Fang? He is your _brother_! He takes care of you! He's the one that—"

"THIS IS NOT ABOUT FANG! OR YOU!" Iggy stood up and screamed back at me, emotion showing in his eyes, even though they were fixed straight ahead, instead of upon me. "It's about both of you! And the way you're acting. You know that Nudge loves you so much that she would never say anything, _despite_ the fact that she never stops talking. And Angel? She's a _mind reader_, for Christ's sakes! You think she doesn't hear what's going on?" I felt a pang. I remembered holding her, minutes ago. She cried to me. It doesn't happen often, but when it does, it hurts me. I don't like to see it. "I feel bad for her, because she probably gets the worst of it. She not only hears what you say when you two fight, but she also hears what you _don't say_, whatever the hell that may be. You're confusing her, you're _hurting her, god damn it_!"

"I know what this is about, Iggy," I said, coldly, interrupting him with a low tone in my voice. I knew somewhere that all that he was saying had some discernable amount of truth to it, or at least it must have, but I was also fuming that he was acting like such an asshole. Or, more appropriately, what _I thought_ to be like such an asshole. He was probably right. "This is about _you_. You call me selfish?" His eyes shifted to me, where the sound was coming from. He was still breathing heavily, and anger was still present on his face. "You're _jealous_." I was out for blood. "You're jealous that Fang and I are seeing things in each other that no one sees in you. This isn't about Gazzy, or Nudge, or Angel. It's about you, Iggy. Don't think that I don't see through your bullshit, and don't think that Fang doesn't, either."

"So now you and Fang are on the same side? He throws puts you into a wall, and now you're gonna stick up for him? You're hopeless," Iggy said, equally as cold and cutting as me. I don't remember telling Iggy about the wall. He hadn't been in here for that.

"I heard it, in case you're wondering. I heard it from upstairs." Oh. "I'm done with this. You and Fang need to sort out your shit before it tears everyone apart." Before I could get in another word, he had opened up the front door, and taken off. God knew where he was going. And you know, it wasn't until now that I realized that I was both crying _and_ shaking, in respective realization and anger. Not anger at Iggy himself, but anger at both the fact that he was _right_, and the fact that he had brought this whole thing up. That bastard.

I turned around, fuming, and noticed that Fang, Gazzy, Angel, and Nudge were standing in the dining room, having watched the whole episode. My heart sank to the floor at the disappointed look in Gazzy's face, and the pensive defiance in Fang's, looking off to the side. It sank even further when I saw that both Angel and Nudge were crying.

"Guys, I…" my voice trailed off as I took a step toward them. Gazzy and Angel both took a step back, appearing frightful of me. I stepped back, and sat on the chair, feeling fresh, hot tears stream down my face. Not tears of sadness. But of anger, of bitterness. I knew, deep down, that it wasn't true, but it felt like Iggy had poisoned the Flock against me. Not Fang. Just me.


	4. Chapter 4

I turned to the Flock, or, what was left of the. Fang, his defiance written all over his face, stood away from them, looking as if he was formulating what he was going to say next. I was hurt. Not just by Iggy, but by the reactions of the younger kids, too. They backed off, almost as if they were afraid of me. What did they think I was going to do? Hurt them?

"Guys, listen." They all focused their eyes on me. "Everything's going to be fine," I said, wiping my eyes. It then occurred to me that I had _no idea_ how long they had been standing there. "Iggy and I, we just need to calm down." I stepped toward them again, and to my relief, no one stepped back. If they had, they would have hit the dining room table. I extended my arms, and I beckoned Nudge, Gazzy, and Angel to me. Everyone but Fang, who stood steadfast where he was, came forward and we shared a cathartic, calming hug. It was nice. It felt like it centered me.

Realistically, I didn't think that the younger kids actually _understood_ what was happening. Yeah, Angel heard everything that we said, and worse, thought, but I don't really think that she grasped the true emotion, the intrinsic _feeling_ of how we were acting. Listen to me, Maximum Ride, the great philosopher. Her words, the things that she had said to me before were all echoing inside my head. _Iggy… he's in pain_. It hurt _me_ just thinking about it. After all, he was our easy-going brother. Hurting him would be like you hurting your grandmother… _you just don't do it_.

He told me, more or less, that the "turmoil" between Fang and I was hurting the kids. He got my temper boiling, and I accused him, more out of anger than true suspicion, of being jealous of the two of us. But now that had me thinking. Was he really sticking up for the kids? Or was the whole situation between Fang and I getting to him in more ways than he was letting on? In the way that I accused him?

I had to find out. I couldn't bear not knowing. And from what I could tell by looking at him, neither could Fang. I mean, his face wasn't very demonstrative, but when you're living with Fang, you learn to pick up on the subtle clues.

"We're going to talk to Iggy," Fang said, addressing the kids. "We'll be back soon. Wait for Dr. Martinez and Ella to come home. Don't go anywhere," Fang ordered. Nudge nodded, and Gazzy exhibited a flicker of… something in his eyes. "And Gazzy, if you blow something up, or set something on fire, I _will_ hurt you. Now is _not the time_, dude," Fang continued sternly. Gazzy looked a bit disappointed, but he realized the big picture enough to where he appeared to have understood where Fang was coming from. Fang walked into the living room, grabbed his jacket off of the arm of the couch (which Mom had told him countless times _not to do_) and said, not looking at me, "Let's go."

We headed out the front door, and it was at this time that I realized that I had no idea how to feel about being alone with Fang. On one hand, he was the cause of all of this. Or, at least, I'd like to think so. We had fought, and he used me (my back, really) to demolish the far living room wall, which Mom was no doubt going to come after _me_ for. Maybe I could just blame it on Iggy and Gaz. On the other hand, I was feeling stronger for him by the day… I mean, we had gotten hot and heavy a few times… nothing past second base… but I was (and if you repeat this, I will find you and break your legs) _head over heels for him_. At least I think. We took off, and we searched the sky, and didn't see him anywhere. So much for raptor vision. The next stop was the clearing, which, if I knew Iggy (and I did) he would be there. We had set that as our meeting spot in case of an emergency. It was about 20 miles from the house, and flying, that took only minutes.

**Iggy**

I was too angry to speak. All these thoughts, coursing through my head, not allowing me to focus on anything. Max. She's so… bitchy. No. Bitchy doesn't even _begin_ to describe it. And she calls me _jealous_? Of what? That I don't get to be close enough with her to hear her rant _all the time_, as opposed to only when she's awake? She's got balls, I'll tell you.

I think about what this whole thing must be doing to the rest of them, and yeah, I feel really bad for the kids, but deep down, I hated to admit it, but _she was right_. I wasn't jealous of them, not personally, but I guess I have to say that knowing that they were (somewhat) together and (sometimes) happy… well… it made my lovesickness grow every day. I mean, sometimes I just wanted to slap the both of them and say "Wake up! Don't you see you have _everything_ someone could want _right in front of you_?!" And they call _me_ the blind one.

I never did this, and I didn't plan on doing it. Well, before today. I mean, for some reason, I don't know what it was, I was itching to confront someone today. I woke up on the wrong side of the bed, and being with Gazzy all day didn't really make things a lot more cheerful for me. I mean, I loved the kid. And I knew that he looked up to me, but sometimes, too much was too much. When I walked into that room, it was because Gaz wanted to see Max, to ask if we could see a movie tomorrow. Well, if _they_ could see a movie. I sorta just tagged along and listened when they did that. But as soon as I walked into that room, I heard it. The heavy, nasal breathing, the awkward tone in their voice… they were kissing again. Just before, I had heard the _thump_ come from downstairs, which meant that they were fighting again. Jesus. I wondered if it was ever going to end.

I longed, I _hurt_ for someone to care about me in the way they care for one another. All of the fighting aside, you and I both know that Max and Fang are both _perfect_ _and crazy_ for one another. That's coming from your boy, Iggy, now. Ha. But really, my only desires at the moment were narrowed down to two things: I wanted the two of them to make up their minds… which meant that they pretty much _had_ to admit the way they felt. And I wanted… beyond all measure, beyond everything else I could ever want… including my eyesight… I wanted someone to care about. To be able to hold someone in my arms in a way that was _more_ than just a fraternal kind of love. I was lovesick, but… it was more than that. It was _hurting_ me inside having to watch Max and Fang, and not have someone of my own to love and to have love me back.

It was at that moment, I heard the hard, pounding footsteps of someone running out their landing. Predictably, Max and Fang had come, most likely to attempt to "talk some sense" into me. Maybe now _was_ the time to tell them.


End file.
